Hit the Back Button to Move Fwd by Gavin Richardson

getting bored with blogging

andrew and jordon are both speaking to a boredom with blogging. both have been doing this for some 10 years (although i think part of it started as personal websites, that the case, i could claim the same, however i know they've been blogging before it was called such, so that is pretty remarkable). i suppose i would get bored, during that time, heck, i get bored with just doing this for a year and half. jordon mentioned a couple of funny parts, that i think came back to this statement.

.. I forgot how much fun it was to explore a new area of learning and think through it.

i know many have started bloggging because they have felt 'they had something to say' & i'd admit that i did much the same, but luckily for me, that quickly changed.

me, i've said many times, this is part of my spiritual practice. reflections of my life, in whatever form they take. admittedly i create posts on days when it's just tough to find that special reflection. i know it's there somewhere, so my hope is by focusing on the day or what is happening around i see a movement of God in life.

i don't know if i'd get rid of the merit of blogging in my life, i see the effect. however, for others who do this for other reasons i can see that it lends itself to boredom and giving up. some thoughts.

• the political commentary blog: unless you are getting paid (and even if you are) that same old stuff can get old, although theres a wealth of stuff to bitch about
• the bitch blog: seriously, how much stuff can complain about before you get old and bitter.. bitching only shallows the heart and you have to be a pain for others to be around, you either have to throw in some optimism somewhere or you'll give it up
• the theology blog: you can't reinvent your theology on a daily basis so you throw out thoughts or papers and then end up defending them which, as tony and doug, have found is boring
• the social cause blog: in doing my own social cause stuff, i remember saying the same things over and over again, unless you make this a news blog, you will end up doing the same thing, readers stop reading and then you are saying the same thing to no one.. that stinks
• the science blog: certainly there are new things with science all the time, but the old school won't accept blogs posts as legitimate information, can you do a hypothesis & control group on the web? chances are you end up arguing just like theology blog
• the picture blog: although i do a picture share once a week and call it 'photography' it really is just an opportunity to give me a break from my internet addiction.. you can honestly be taking pictures on a regular basis that you call art...

am i missing some? i know this isn't an exhaustive listing. my thoughts being, bloggin has to be a personal reflection on life, otherwise it can only lead to a boredom that you just give up because of said boredom.

a cloud of unknowing

In the power of grace, and in the strenght of eager and joyful desire, this is the lightest work of all. Otherwise it is hard, and a wonder if you achieve it.

Work away, then until desire is kindled. When you first began you will find only darkness and, as it were, a cloud of unknowing.

You cannot tell what it is, excepting that you feel in yoru will a naked reaching out to God.

This cloud and this darkness, no matter what you do, is between you and your God. It prevents you from seeing him clearly with you mind and from experiencing the sweetness of his love in your heart.
Prepare yourself to wait in this darkness as long as you may, ever calling after him whom you love.
If ever you shall feel him or see him - as far as is possible here below - it must always be in this cloud and this darkness.

If you will but work on earnestly as I bed you, I believe that in his mercy you will win through.

as we enter into the lent season, let us see through those rough clouds that hold us back from a spiritual life we seek.

made me smile

a friend sent this too me. it might be staged. it doesn't look photoshopped. who the heck cares, i loved it and it made me smile.

i miss my friend

in my prior post i mentioned sharing a story about my friend mike. to this day, i miss my friend.

mike was one of my crew of childhood friends that i'll never forget and never stop being friends with. we met him in seventh grade and forged a tight friendship in just two years. going into our freshman year in hs, his mom had a messy divorce with a real ass of a man. he kicked her and her two boys (mike and jeff, younger brother) out of the house. mike's mom, not having any options to stay in town, moved down to delaware where she had a beach house (15 miles from the beach, in what was a shade above a trailer park area). however, it was a place.

we, as friends, often went down and stayed with mike spending a lot of time at the beach riding our bikes over the oc maryland when we were really bored or just hanging out. at other times mike came home with one of us and did stuff back in the hometown.

i remember once bringing him on our youth group trip to ocean city (it was a conference trip, but i just knew we went to the shore). i remember this one because i rode a bike around the town wearing a leg cast (broke ankle playing soccer earlier in month). and mike ran around with me, while i rode.. and i remember someone picking a fight with me and mike making them stand down, as he was a much taller person than most our age.

somewhere in the distance our frienship maintained, but mike made new friends with the people in his area of delaware. with these friends began his drug use. his drug use became addictive and destructive. eventually he went into a very radical intensive treatment, by force i think, and came out clean. only a smoking habit to show for it (minor considering). he was the same mike, good natured and fun, with a huge heart.

mike huge heart allowed his old friends to stay friends. and unfortunately his old friends kept their old habits. in what i can only assume was mike being mad at poor roommate ettiquette he had a fight with one of his roomies, while they were hopped up on cocaine. when mike turned to walk away from the argument the roomie "friend" beat him with a coffee cup into a coma.

mike died one week later.

i went to his funeral and met many old friends there. only a few were from our circle from years prior. others were friends from mike's darker days. when it was over we stood around and talked, told some stories and then the 'friends' said, let's all just go get drunk.. i thought that odd, but then realized that this is just how they knew him. me, i knew a vibrant life, always running (or riding) to some new adventure, a peacemaker and friend of everyone. he had a heart that had no measure, in a heart that should have known only cold (having lost a father to cancer and seen his mother through an unhealthy 2nd relationship, which he wasn't treated too well either).

so i remembered my friend tonight, as i do with some frequency. i shared my story with him tonight, something i don't frequently do. i made peace that i carry mike with me, this is how he lives on, but it doesn't help... i still miss my friend

some croppings from some old pics, i think this was 8th grade camp. mike the two on the left, that's me on the right for reference... they are old

a heavy night

tonight we had our attorney general of sumner county, ray whitley (who happens to be a member of our church), share about our growing meth problem in tennessee. i told the youth that this evening wasn't just going to be a info session about meth, but we would explore this problem and what our Christian response needs to be. true to form, we had a lower number of youth, but with the parents and other laity of the church that came we had a packed house.

we started the evening with our rituals of prayers of joy and concern & the passing of shalom. i briefed the members of the church that don't frequent youth evenings to just 'go with it' and the youth would help to lead which they did. i think they enjoyed it too.

then began our exploration..

turning back to earlier in the week i was thinking of the "Christian response" i promised. i had made plans to go through our social principles and read some scriptures. i looked over a couple of scriptures, most of them having to do with drunkenness (there's not much biblical reference to meth), but i didn't meditate on the scriptures like i usually do.

till today..

i printed out the social principles regarding alcohol and drugs. set up the room and then spent some time in the scriptures. one of the scriptures i fell into was Ephesians 5: 15-20.

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

what spoke to me was not that the drunkenness brings about 'debauchery' but that to be consumed with addiction to the drugs keeps one from being able to live

...with the Spirit. Speak(ing) to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord

as i've gone through life many of the people i've met who have been addicted to drugs, have no psalms in their soul. they are people who you can see into their eyes and they are empty. no passion, no care, no love, no hope.. only physical cravings that cannot be controlled.

so i started this time of education off with that image from the scriptures. ray, stepped in to share his experiences within the county and the state as a prosecutor. he shared a graphic video that was developed as well as some posters with images that are pretty disturbing (the youth got grossed out with some of those). after answering some questions i closed us out.

i shared my experiences of my life with my friend mike being murdered by a 'friend' who was hopped up on cocaine some nine years ago. (i won't go into details on that, it merits it's own posting) as with any sharing that is deeply etched into my soul, it was a heavy moment. i picked up one poster with an image of a girl who got addicted to meth and read the scripture again.. this time i added in other drugs to be addicted too. and emphasized the psalms that we need to help share with each other.

psalms are not always fun and happy. youth & adults don't need to feel like everything is happy happy, that not real, but what is real is the passion that is contained within the psalms of people. you love, you are mad, you reconcile, you move on, you praise, but you know that God is faithful to you and his called people will lift you up. we broke with a "shalom" and i gave them a candle to light throughout the week to help them center and symbolize praying for friends whom are dealing with addictions that they may regain their psalm.

after we closed i got some hugs from the youth (and some adults) i think some partly to show care & affirmation that my sharing touched them and they care for me. in days past i would have shoved that off because my sharing isn't for my promotions, but i've come to know that i am a part of the community & i am to be cared for as well, so it was comforting (but strange in the same as i'm not usually on the receiving end of that). one comment is sticking with me. adam came up to me and said "that was heavy." i said, "yeah, i'm sorry for that." he said, "no, it's good that it was heavy."

it was heavy, and i think it did need to be. i hope that in the futures these youth whom i have come to love so much make decisions and guide their friends to make decisions that keep them from experiencing loss similar to my experience. it sucks and hurts for years after.

sunday photoblog : among the ruins

mega church the game

john mentioned choosing to play mega church over some of the more violent games.. is there a difference? i love the product description

• Select a pre-loaded community
  • Xurban or suburban church plant              (for those who want it easy or just starting out)
  • Or pastor an inner-city, multi-ethnic 80 year old church with 50 members and $1 million mortgage debt (for those who really want a challenge)       

• Choose a denomination (Lutheran, Catholic, Baptist, Pentecostal plus many more obscure factions)
• Or load a  brand new emergent plug-in
• Take weekly offerings and go over budget
• Start your own radio or cable-access show
• Attend the latest conference to hone your skills
• Implement the latest ministry fad

the practicing house

today i am doing some cleaning, but it's been so long since i've done a good gutting of the home that it's overwhelming. i'm not sure where to start at times. my home has become one of my greater stressors. it's a distance from my work & erin, so i'm driving quite a distance to get to and from where i generall go now. at times of the year i'm rarely home and weekends that are not devoted to the church have family or personal times written on them. the stress flowers because i forget so often to treat the home as part of my practice of faith.

the folks at practicing our faith share this practice through household economics. it's a blend of spending/buying and our home life. i'm in need of careful attention to both, but today it's about cleaning a home.

Our households are anchoring places that define our basic ways of life. Most of us call our primary dwelling place "home". Does the word "home" bring to mind your town or region, or your own house or apartment? Where does our planet home fit in? Do we defend the earth with the same vigor we may defend the security of our private homes?

 

the practice i'm working on today

Divest yourself of things you don't use. Pair up with someone and promise to help each other go through closets and garages to find every item you haven't used in a year and donate it to an organization or recycle it. Then, don't buy anything for a month. If you see something you want, put it on a list to wait until the month is up. What happens at the end of the month? Do you still really want the things on the list by the time the month is over?

it's gotta be bad when this happens

my bro at church, david, tipped me off to this one. being the non-gamer, this isn't what i keep up on, but who would have thought that the prostitutes are now angry at grand theft auto.

The Grand Theft Auto franchise is getting attacked from all angles. Joining the ranks of politicians, policemen, and attorneys in their crusade to see the game lifted from shelves are the nation's sex workers. On its Web site, the Sex Workers Outreach Project USA is asking parents to assist them in calling for a ban of Take-Two Interactive's controversial game.

i think what i find funny is that such an organization exists. not to mention on their website they have an article titled "reclaiming porn from pimps." and jonathon isn't the pimp they are talking about.

:: article ::

gone 'gavoweb'

so i jumped in and made this site www.gavoweb.com. all the old links should still work, i've just mapped the domain name into the site, much like wesleyradio.typepad.com gives you wesleyblog. "gavoweb" started in college as an instant messenger name, i was actually one of a few folks who did websites through straight up code with notepad back in the day. now, i'm smarter, not the web programmer i used to be, but gavoweb seems to be the only username that i can count on having from site to site. so i've kept it, now it's stuck. even erin calls me "gavoweb" sometimes.

Jesus as a teenager

And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him...

they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and his answers. When his parents saw him, they were astonished. His mother said to him, "Son, why have you treated us like this? Your father and I have been anxiously searching for you."

"Why were you searching for me?" he asked. "Didn't you know I had to be in my Father's house?" But they did not understand what he was saying to them.

terry brought up this poster of Jesus as a teenager. what do you all think? i'm thinking that he looks incredibly western european, an orthodox Jew would have some semblance of hair. i think Jesus would have a six pack too, so i think that is accurate. &:~)

welcome hfumc

welcome hfumc to my blog. for those of you who are traveling here from micheal's 'glimpses of God' article i extend hospitality to my little web world here. this is my web journal, part of my spiritual practice, reflecting on my pilgrimage through life. feel free to comment or surf archives, there are some 500 plus postings (some more serious than others), that cover my own; feelings, prayers, thoughts on church, theology, and my goofy friends that have collected over the past 17 months i've been doing this.

i extend welcome not just as a "hello," but this is some reflection of my life, so you are welcome to become part of my life here, while continuing to be a part of my church family

naming that service

at hfumc we have started this wednesday night worship service that focuses on telling our stories and coming to the table (i can't say communion because at times we have had to entertain love feasts). we had a meeting about it last week to vision it's future. we like the intimacy, the changes in styles of music, how it is very much layity lead, and the times of stillness that the service brings for the mid week. these all circulate around someone sharing their faith story & ending with the sacraments.

we want to name it something other than 'the wednesday night service.' can you help a bro out?

i don't want to get into something so obscure that no one would know what it is (ie. the 7:27 names which could be any book of the bible with a chapter 7 that has a 27th verse, or an passenger plane.. we don't want to have to explain that over and over). but there are faithful expressions that evoke the spirit of worship that people can relate too. i'd like some help in brainstorming.

thanks, in advance. -g

big time had by all

so the youth ministries of hfumc took to the slopes this weekend for the first time in a few years. we had 16 total folks (johnathan included) coupled with jonathon's group from humc. it was a ton of fun, but as many things with youth retreats, rather exhausting in the same.

we went skiing through lake junaluska which was the path of least resistance when it comes to planning. or so we thought. there was quite a bit of chaos with getting onto the slopes, ski rental, much of that aggravation to be shared with the ski resort. skiing the first day was okay at best, we had some miserable weather to start the day. renting skis took hours for many of the youth of our groups, some gave up until later in the day. however, the youth took it really well, they got on the slopes and took the mountain after some numerous falls. i had to come to rescue a time or two. at one point i found one youth with only one ski & another with just one pole, so i gave away my poles and traded two gloves for one. so i skied down the hill with one hand in my pocket and the other a single pole. this was okay till i leaned too far forward for a turn and then hit a patch of heavy snow and took a facial with my hand in pocket unable to recover to help me out.

sej facilities are pretty darn cool, from shackford hall (since it's renovation), the kern youth building and the hotels there's quite a bit to get into. we had some nice meals for the numbers of people they were cooking for (the coffee tasted quite good for baseline home brew). the coffee house was cool and our youth enjoyed that with the game room. worship wasn't mine or any of the rest of my groups fav part of the retreat. for one, it started at 9pm and went past 11pm.. that's late for a group that has been up since 6am that day for breakfast. the music was okay, one particular musician is incredibly blessed and i appreciated her sharing of gifts. my kids go scolded by someone from the sej personnel in the 110 minute of worship time (that makes it 10:50pm).

the next days skiing was fabulous weather. quite sunny with warm temperatures. many hit the slopes for the whole day. i had fun skiing with many of them throughout the day. i'm an ex-accomplished skier. ex-accomplished: i used to be good when i lived in the north and went numerous times a year. now i'm just okay, but can manage down the hill. i basically skied around with my camera taking pics. i'm really glad i can do that, it makes my day an adventure to go around and catch each youth on film.

our last evening was lax. we hung out in the coffee house and game room till they closed and then engaged in a game of spoons. i can't remember the last time i was around a spoons game, this one was great fun. we had another good time watching a pseudo slide show of the pictures we took of the weekend, making up conversations for the pictures that came up. off to bed after that

sunday morning we had a short devotional time as a whole group, took some last group pictures & were on the road. it was a great time for friendships, old and new, & friendships within the umc. the sentiment is to keep skiing as a youth ministry, but i think we'll do a trip that helps to give more time for friends and telling of stories, that's the nature of our ski trip.

sunday photoblog : saint robert of molesme

so far so good

we woke to rain/sleet this morning, but by afternoon we had snow & fog, which was an improvement. no injuries so far, just tired kids. currently the youth leaders here seem to be in the coffee house while youth are in the game room.. go figure. more later

not what i paid for

so tonight, erin & i took in a concert for our relationship week (or lack of, but that's another post). unfortunately i thought we'd get a concert, but instead it felt like a listening session of way fm (constant commercials with some music) with a mini-sermon in between each song, no lie.

so i don't get misunderstood, i'm okay with the Christian concert and the artist. however, i'm wondering what happened tonight when it was some blur of song, devotion, advertisement, song, plug for sponsor (best world vision plug i've heard), song, devotion, song, intermission (which there was some sorta plug done during this time, but i was outside the venue), song, devotion, song, devotion, prayer, sermon... we left..

our leaving was more out of tiredness & a need to have some energy before a full weekend for both of us. but it helped that there was commenting of "gee, there are lots of commercials at this concert" that aided our decision making.

in this blur i think, what happened to artists sharing their songs with a simple story or testimony? that seemed appropriate. has somewhere the stage platform, with mic in hand, became a source of power that we are now succumbed to said artisans viewpoints agreed or disagreed (for this one, i agreed whole heartedly, but i didn't need to agree to all 10 times). maybe it's my consumerism coming out of me, but i did pay to hear music (granted it was more for one of the opening acts) and be inspired & touched by their gifts in songwriting & musicianship. not the preaching skills

well, i'm off on a ski trip tomorrow with my youth and jonathon's. we may or may not be blogging..

the cloud of forgetting

Just as this cloud of unknowing is above you and between you and your God, so too you must put a cloud of forgetting beneath you and between you and all created things.

It may, perhaps, seem to you that you are a long way off from God because of this cloud of knowing between you and him.

But surely, if the truth be told, you are much further from him when you have no cloud forgetting between him and all his creatures.

When I speak of God's creatures I mean not them only, whether bodily or spiritual, but also their state and their works, whether good or evil.

In short, i tell you, everything is to be hidden under the cloud of forgetting.

so whose day is it?

it's valentines day, so get off the computer and go hang out with someone you love.. go!

if you are done with them, then let me ask, whose day today is? some say it's hallmark's day. or the day of Saint Valentine.. but which one, or are they the same person?

why we read in context

i'm an advocate for reading in context and not a literal reading.. otherwise you stand a chance of quoting satan.

if it doesn't jump out too you.. look at the banner graphic. it says:

if thou therefore wilt worship me, then all shall be thine. Luke 4:7

where the context says:

The devil led him up to a high place and showed him in an instant all the kingdoms of the world. And he said to him, "I will give you all their authority and splendor, for it has been given to me, and I can give it to anyone I want to. So if you worship me, it will all be yours."

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Worship the Lord your God and serve him only.' "

Luke 4: 5-8

:: tips 1 & 2 ::

update: the graphic in question has now been changed. richard hall has done some homework on the matter. the claim seems to be the site had been hacked. this is possible, usually hack jobs get picked up quickly though, but it's possible. i didn't attack the church, i'm sure they are all fine folks, so i don't apologize for highlighting this, i think it's a valid point. however, i did remove the link to the church from here, it's no longer needed

update2: the church, posted this on their website.

For those of you who were kind enough to inform us     about our previously inaccurate quote...we thank you!     We were recently made aware that the former     quote we had posted in the header on our site  was actually not based on the word of Jesus     but was a quote posed to him during his temptation.  As soon as we were     made aware of this we removed the quote from our site.  We removed it...not     hackers as some ill-informed bloggers would have you believe.  This lesson     is a demonstration why when using tools online to identify quotes that you     think deliver the honest and sincere message you intended you should always     view the quotes in their whole context.

my strengths, apparently

our church does this strengths finder test and program as part of it's ministry. i've been asked to do this for months now. so i finally got around to taking the test part. i think i did it pretty honestly with a couple of lapses of concentration for two phone calls and just phasing out for a minute. erin says this is pretty much me & i trust her opinion.

C O N N E C T E D N E S S

Things happen for a reason. You are sure of it. You are sure of it because in your soul you know that we are all connected. Yes, we are individuals, responsible for our own judgments and in possession of our own free will, but nonetheless we are part of something larger. Some may call it the collective unconscious. Others may label it spirit or life force. But whatever your word of choice, you gain confidence from knowing that we are not isolated from one another or from the earth and the life on it. This feeling of Connectedness implies certain responsibilities. If we are all part of a larger picture, then we must not harm others because we will be harming ourselves. We must not exploit because we will be exploiting ourselves. Your awareness of these responsibilities creates your value system. You are considerate, caring, and accepting. Certain of the unity of humankind, you are a bridge builder for people of different cultures. Sensitive to the invisible hand, you can give others comfort that there is a purpose beyond our humdrum lives. The exact articles of your faith will depend on your upbringing and your culture, but your faith is strong. It sustains you and your close friends in the face of life's mysteries.

I N T E L L E C T I O N

You like to think. You like mental activity. You like exercising the "muscles" of your brain, stretching them in multiple directions. This need for mental activity may be focused; for example, you may be trying to solve a problem or develop an idea or understand another person's feelings. The exact focus will depend on your other strengths. On the other hand, this mental activity may very well lack focus. The theme of Intellection does not dictate what you are thinking about; it simply describes that you like to think. You are the kind of person who enjoys your time alone because it is your time for musing and reflection. You are introspective. In a sense you are your own best companion, as you pose yourself questions and try out answers on yourself to see how they sound. This introspection may lead you to a slight sense of discontent as you compare what you are actually doing with all the thoughts and ideas that your mind conceives. Or this introspection may tend toward more pragmatic matters such as the events of the day or a conversation that you plan to have later. Wherever it leads you, this mental hum is one of the constants of your life.

A D A P T A B I L I T Y

You live in the moment. You don't see the future as a fixed destination. Instead, you see it as a place that you create out of the choices that you make right now. And so you discover your future one choice at a time. This doesn't mean that you don't have plans. You probably do. But this theme of Adaptability does enable you to respond willingly to the demands of the moment even if they pull you away from your plans. Unlike some, you don't resent sudden requests or unforeseen detours. You expect them. They are inevitable. Indeed, on some level you actually look forward to them. You are, at heart, a very flexible person who can stay productive when the demands of work are pulling you in many different directions at once.

I N C L U D E R

"Stretch the circle wider." This is the philosophy around which you orient your life. You want to include people and make them feel part of the group. In direct contrast to those who are drawn only to exclusive groups, you actively avoid those groups that exclude others. You want to expand the group so that as many people as possible can benefit from its support. You hate the sight of someone on the outside looking in. You want to draw them in so that they can feel the warmth of the group. You are an instinctively accepting person. Regardless of race or sex or nationality or personality or faith, you cast few judgments. Judgments can hurt a person's feelings. Why do that if you don't have to? Your accepting nature does not necessarily rest on a belief that each of us is different and that one should respect these differences. Rather, it rests on your conviction that fundamentally we are all the same. We are all equally important. Thus, no one should be ignored. Each of us should be included. It is the least we all deserve.

I N P U T

You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect information-words, facts, books, and quotations-or you might collect tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls, or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite variety and complexity. If you read a great deal, it is not necessarily to refine your theories but, rather, to add more information to your archives. If you like to travel, it is because each new location offers novel artifacts and facts. These can be acquired and then stored away. Why are they worth storing? At the time of storing it is often hard to say exactly when or why you might need them, but who knows when they might become useful? With all those possible uses in mind, you really don't feel comfortable throwing anything away. So you keep acquiring and compiling and filing stuff away. It's interesting. It keeps your mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.

sunday photoblog : field of soul

don't argue with the women

one of my readings over the week was some stories of Saint Benedict, however, my favorite was over his twin sister Saint Scholastica, who happened to have her memorial day yesterday. the following is a story told by Saint Gregory, which goes to show all us men.. saint or no saint, don't argue with women, God doesn't even

I must tell you how the saintly Benedict once had a wish he was unable to fulfill.

His sister Scholastica, who had been consecrated to God in early childhood, used to visit with him once a year. On these occassions he would go down to meet her in a house belonging to the monastery a short distance from the entrance.

For this particular visit he joined her there with a few of his disciples and they spent the whole day singing God's praises and conversing about the spiritual life. When darkness was setting in, they took their meal together and continued their conversation at the table until it was quite late. Then the holy nun said to him, "Please do not leave me tonight, brother. Let us keep on talking about the joys of heaven till morning."

"what are you saying, sister?" he replied. "You know I cannot stay away from the monastery."

The sky was so clear at the time, there was not a cloud in sight. At her brother's refusal Scholastica folded her hands on the table and rested her head upon them in earnest prayer. When she looked up again, there was a sudden burst of lightning and thunder accompanied by such a downpour that Benedict and his companions were unable to set foot outside the door.

By shedding a flood of tears while she prayed, this holy nun had darkened the cloudless sky with a heavy rain. The storm began as soon as her prayer was over. In fact, the two coincided so closely that the thunder was already resounding as she raised her head from the table. The very instant she ended her prayer the rain poured down.

Realizing that he could not return to the abbey in this terrible storm, Benedict compained bitterly. "God forgive you, sister!" he said. "What have you done?"

Scholastica simply answered, "When I appealed to you, you would not listen to me. So I turned to my God and He heard my prayer. Leave now if you can. Leave me here and go back to your monastery."

This, of course, he could not do. He had no choice now but to stay, in spite of his unwillingness. They spent the entire night together and both of them derived great profit from the holy thoughts they exchanged about the interior life.

another reading would tell you that she wanted to stay and talk because she knew it would be the last time they saw each other that way. which, as Saint Gregory would later tell, three days later Saint B. saw his sisters spirit rise up to heaven as a dove.

The Card

 

For those who are used to the Emergent events that were sponsored with Youth Specialties, where you would get a back pack and walk into each session to discover a book or CD on your seat, you might have been disappointed –at first.

That initial evening all Tony Jones handed out was a card with what looked like a poem on it. Though Tony attributed the words to Miroslav Volf, he didn't seem to remember saying or writing them. In any case, I thought the card was perhaps the best gift we could have received, because contain an incredibly succinct outline of the theological task.

You see for a long time I have believed that theology can and should originate in both the church and the academy, then grow as a conversation takes place between the two. Too often we have worked out of a model in which theology produced in the academy was then handed “down” ( hear the inappropriate spatial metaphor) to the church, who then would apply it in practice. In fact, theology emerges from the practice of the faith in community—both the congregational and the academic community.

One of the things I appreciate most about the thinking of Miroslav Volf is that he works from his own experience of faith/life, struggling with issues that directly affect the practice of his faith/life (can he embrace a Serb who has committed atrocities against Croatians?), and does so in the context of scripture and the theological and philosophical tradition. While he has more academic training than the run-of-the-mill pastor or parishioner, the model for the struggle from which theology emerges is one that can be shared with congregations of all sorts..

On the card were these words:(This is exactly the way it reads. You can add your own changes in capitalization and/or punctuation.)

god.

who is god.

what is god doing in the world.

how is god achieving this.

us.

who are we.

where are we going.

how are we supposed to get there.

connecting the two.

what should we ultimately trust.

how should we order our trusts, provisional and ultimate.

Shalom,

Michael

capital letters?

if you were wondering what the capital letters & proper grammar came from this week. well, it wasn't me. big thanks to michael, my pastor at hfumc for stepping in. he's great & is a natural blogger, so i'm glad all things worked out for him to share his experiences with the theologic conversation (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) while i was away. the conversation sounded like it turned out wonderfully, with some hobnobbing with some big names of our theo geek world. since i didn't give you a proper intro of michael, i direct thanks to jonathon for covering for me. and mad props to my wannabe-rabbi friend

i hope to be back conversing with everyone sometime tomorrow as we settle in for some snow here in nashville

abbey journal

the following is my journal of this pilgrimage of silence with the trappists. this 'journal' is a strange mix of stories, narratives written for me, and with some narratives written for you. i couldn't decide who i was writing for. i hope it doesn't confuse if you care to read it at all. if you wish you can view some of my pictures. the photo album is sure to be updated.

shalom, -g

day 1:

this is my first day at the abbey. arrived with no problem, their directions are quite good (although i might contest their mileage numbers). was greeted by brother thadeus and given my room. i was surprised to find that most of the retreat house is in constant silence, instead of just observing silence for a period of time. the silence does pervade the space, you can feel as if God's presence is more apparent. my room is nice, all that one needs & nothing more.

i made my first prayer service. i was bummed to find that i cannot sit in the choir lofts with the monks. that has been something i've gotten used too. i understand it though, this space is much more popular than other one i've frequented. prayers were great, it took me some time to get into the rhythm, not to mention the sign of the cross and genuflecting on que.

dinner was nice. this i was worried about as the trappists are vegetarians. i like my burger. so far so good. they make cheese here as part of their labor, so i enjoyed trying their cheeses.

i met father anton after that, he is the guestmaster and does a little introduction & video to new retreat-ants. i was the only one who was new, so it was just he and i. i enjoyed hearing his viewpoint of the history of the abbey, brother lewis (thomas merton), St. Benedict, & a history of monasteries. much i already knew, but it was interesting to see what points he uplifted as teachable. i loved the video, it was wonderfully peaceful. the teaching woven into the video by father matthew was fun, humble, and with depth.

we closed with compline, which has always been a favorite hour of prayer of mine. i've been incredibly horrible lately of keeping this hour (for some reason i've been a whole lot better keeping mid-day and evening prayer). what was interesting is that the brothers seem to do all of compline in the dark. there were some lights, but in the choir loft it was quite dark and i'd have a hard time understanding how all could see the Psalms & prayerbook. which makes me wonder, have they memorized the compline? they gather in community prayer seven times a day, they go through the whole book of Psalms every two weeks. is it like that of my liturgy where i know from heart the response and flow? i don't know. we closed with a blessing from the abbot. i retreated to my room for reading, a phone call home, and sleep.

day 2:

in my ambition i was up at 3am to join the community for Vigils at 3:15am. i love the opening to Vigils.

"Oh Lord, Open my Lips and My mouth shall proclaim your Praise"

i just find that a wonderful way to start the day, the first words out of the mouth are directed towards God in prayer. at home this energy is generally directed at one of my dogs, "what, you need to go outside?"

i tried to wake and make it to Lauds, or morning prayer, but i had fallen back asleep and the tiredness has shown itself. next prayer time is 12:15. and there are more morning prayers tomorrow.

things i am realizing: 1. i'm way to addicted to the internet, i'm jonesing about not being able to check email, blog, or even surf to read articles that i have no real need for. 2. i see a collision of God speaking on developing a prophetic voice. merton spent his last few years writing on non-violence and peace, so there is a spirit here of that. the books i've brought lean that way as well though they don't speak exactly at that. i'm interested to find what is behind day 2.

yeah, i made it to sext prayers. stopped by the visitor center & gift shop after lunch/dinner. very tempting to buy a bunch of stuff. however, other than some book titles & a dvd of Father Matthew Kelty's homilies i'm not sure i've been touched to purchase a whole lot. good thing, i need to go home with some money.

took a hike to walk off some energy. made it through some muddy trails to get to one of their pilgrim paths. i stopped by a lake with an earthen dam. it reminded me of penuel ridge. i stood for a moment and then started walking. suddenly a beaver, small one, scared the crap out of me as it jumped into the water and swam away from me. i wanted to see the beaver again, so i sat at the edge of the lake hoping beaver would show up again. this one didn't, but soon some more did. these were bigger than the one that scared the crap out of me. they would swim around and then look towards me as if they were checking me out. then they would dive. then a blue heron flew up into the trees from the lakes edge. to this i thought, amazing how much life happens within the depths & surface of a lake even during such a deadening time as winter.

i continued on. walking the path one stumbles on statues, an icon, other artwork, some chairs, rocks and benches all along the path. the signs though continue to point to 'the statues' so i kept going. towards the end of the path there was a little shack for rosary prayers. i thought it was an outhouse. it wasn't but i suppose you can call it a place of release. i continued on, the abbey bell sounded indicating none prayer time. oops missed another prayer time. finding the statues path of the garden of Gethsemani i stopped by and sat and wondered, "what is it i am sleeping on?" "do i need to be doing something?"

after checking out the statues i walked further. i'm not sure i was supposed to do that. there was a trail, but it was well grown over and riddled with sticker bushes. you'd think i'd know better to just turn around, but i felt like there just had to be something at the end of the trail. there just had too. at the end of the trail was the same field that i walked out of onto the trail, but it was another vantage point and nearby was a chair. so i just sat in the chair and listened to the wind rolling over the hills and through the trees. it was cold. across the field i could see through another treeline a lake with shining water. i walked to the lake, St. Edmond's lake. there i stood for awhile watching the sun shine off the lake.

i then turned and walked back through the field, taking an access road that followed the creek bed. i'm not sure i was supposed to do this as i had to navigate across the creek bed (no biggie) and up a hill through woods (also no biggie). not hard, but it wasn't traditional. back into the main garden i strolled in slowly meditating on my time among nature. then the abbey bell scared the crap out of me ringing for the quarter of the hour. i thought my heart was about to go into defib.

took a nap, missed evening prayer and almost missed supper. made compline and have spent the evening reading.. so eventful..

day 3:

uh oh, slept in. i woke for breakfast, but almost missed out on that. i must have been tired as i fell back asleep trying to do some morning reading. woke in time for sext prayers. we were into the pilgrim psalms, which i am more familiar with than the lament psalms, so the prayer time was more enriching & uplifting.

set down after lunch and finished 'prophetic imagination.' quite a bit to contemplate. i am convicted to ask, what voice i am speaking from? as a minister of faith, how can i be all those things the prophets were? or am i to be a prophetic voice at all? it's a bit contrary to the contempative life i've sought & found a place in these last few years.

none prayer time. again, we are in the pilgrim psalms and i am feeling uplifted. i suppose this time is part of my pilgrimage. even though my concept of pilgrimage has a bit to do with travel & my car hasn't left it's parking spot since i arrived. i suppose i am that weary pilgrim that knocked on the door of the abbey, welcomed by one of the brothers, met the porter and have taken refuge here. you know, that's not to hard to imagine now.

took a walk, there are two hills outside the abbey walls with statues. it's cloudy out, not that cold, but not a beautiful day at any level. but i stand on a hill with what could be a statue of Christ as a shepard holding a child. i take some time to chill out then snap some pictures (okay, quite a few pictures). it is now lightly snowing. funny how a snow has turned an otherwise miserable day into something unique.

walked across to the other hill. here lies a tall cross on a bed of rock. the snow is really starting to come down now. there is chair on the hill a number of feet from the cross, but it's at the very top of the hill. i sit and take notice, you can see all around the hillside and behind the walls of the abbey. snow continues to build. i start singing, 'peace be still' as it just wells from my soul. i continue on singing, thank goodness no one is around to hear me, i feel like i sound awful. strange enough, the snow lightens and i feel like this was my release into the trip.

if you've been on retreat a number of times you always go into with some reservations and holding something back. then, then there is a point where you really let go over those reservations and God is allowed to well up inside you. i think this was my point. conversed in a prayer, something to the effect of me being selfish, i was too overly concerned with 'how i looked' than what God was doing in my life.. funny part, i don't think i've looked very good for awhile. so we talked.. the abbey bell rang 3:30, wow, only out here for 15 some minutes. the snow picked up again, this time it was really coming. it was probably the most peaceful snow i've been a part of since i was a child. i thought to myself, at home i would have people emailing about snow policies or the news would be all over it telling where the clouds were going.

i wanted to get up and leave, it was getting cold and snow was building on me, not the ground though. but i remember some words of pennington or merton, to resist the moment to leave and just continue to sit in silence. i'm not well skilled in this, so i struck up a cigar. i had bought a bunch for my brother and sister's new years eve party (he asked me to bring cigars, which we didn't smoke). i took them with me as i used to smoke a pipe during my days at camp, there was something about it, it took care to pack and light & you couldn't run around with a pipe hanging out of your mouth like a cigarette, so in ways, it slowed me down during chaotic times. i have no idea where my old pipe is so i figured, the next best thing. so i sat and smoked a 5 and half dollar cigar on top of a hillside, in a snowstorm, while sitting in silent conversation with God. then i had to try and take a picture of myself, as this just seemed too unreal a moment.

the abbey bell struck 3:45 and i felt that it was time well spent, extinguished my cigar and broke apart the remainder at the base of a spruce tree (i took the wrapper thing with me for your environ conscious). slowly took my time getting back to the guest house and then sat in the dining area drinking some coffee and thawing out over another book.

vespers bell rang and i proceeded to the balcony, there are some more retreats or visitors here now.

i really do enjoy compline, something about it. here they sing this song of Simeon, which i have been blessed with.

Song of Simeon

Lord, save us! save us while we are awake
protect us while we are asleep, that we may keep our watch with Christ
and when we sleep rest in peace.

Lord, now let your servant go in peace; your word has been fulfilled:
My own eyes have seen the salvation
which you have prepared in the sight of every people
A light to reveal you to the nations
and the glory of your people Israel

day 4:

last night i was up later than planned in my lone conversation up until this point. till now i was able to get away with some small one sentence answers, some "good mornings," & a number of nods. tonight i loaned some matches to one of the other retreat-ants. then ended up in a conversation with that particular one and another. both are here as a participating brother to see if this is a future life for them. interesting, one is 19 & the other 48. both have not had what one might call interesting lives, by this they have worked varied jobs, lived as broken people and have come to know Christ somewhere in the mix, nothing that would say to me the monastic vocation is for them. and both do not seem to be too knowledgeable of the ways of a monastery, however, they are here and it was nice to talk to someone. i grew tired and left the conversation after they discussed the life of working in a bakery versus a bread factory. i wish them well on their searches.

getting to bed late meant a rough time getting up in the morning, so i didn't even try for 3:15 vigils. i had hoped to do at least one full day of prayers. maybe some other time. got ready for breakfast and terce prayers.

lunch/dinner had a nice 'talk' going about silence and the desert fathers. the monk who was giving the talk told a story that i've read before, it was nice to hear it told. abba poeman was visited by the high priest of the day to gain a favorable word. abba poeman sat with the priest in silence for some time when a study under the abba said to the man, 'abba, give the priest a good word so that he may go in peace.' to this the abba said, 'if he cannot find favor in my silence then words do no good.' quirky story as the desert fathers and mothers go. another story he told was a saying, 'a man who through his silence has come close to God speaks softly, but walks even softer.'

i am beginning to see the rhythm of my days:

• sleep through vigils
• get up in time for food
• finally attend a prayer time
• take a nap trying to read a book
• wake up in time for more food
• actually get some reading done
• afternoon prayers
• take a long walk
• spend time reflecting on time
• vespers prayer time
• wait for next feeding time
• compline
• wander aimlessly

so goes my day.

compline:
Song of Simeon

Lord, save us! save us while we are awake
protect us while we are asleep, that we may keep our watch with Christ
and when we sleep rest in peace.

Lord, now let your servant go in peace; your word has been fulfilled:
My own eyes have seen the salvation
which you have prepared in the sight of every people
A light to reveal you to the nations
and the glory of your people Israel

day 5:

I woke for lauds prayers. pennington tells that there is something about being up before the rest of the world and being in the silence. i think that is true. for this one it was a funny moment as one of the retreat-ants farted during prayers. i wasn't able to not stop chuckling after that. call it childish, but it brought back all the encounters of the week with people with bowel movements (me included). the purging of a system if you will, the trappists are on a vegetarian diet, which means we are on a vegetarian diet. i've felt the food to be quite good, but it has wreaked havoc on the system.

i was tapped during prayer time as today is memorial to saint scholastica. funny enough, i was reading some st. benedict stories last night before bed and found one of her to be quite fascinating so i wrote it down. just so happened to be the story that i wrote down that they shared this morning. it amazes how things fall into place when they are surrounded by God.

anyhow, slept for a bit and woke for prayers. i have packed up most of my things breakfast starts in 15 minutes, then prayers. i'll take some pictures, purchase some gifts for those at home and be on the road again.

this monastic pilgrimage has come to close, but i again walk with songs in my soul, some new, some old. i hope that i talk a bit softer now and walk even softer.

shalom

Confession of a Techno Challenged Blogger

Well I just worked 45 minutes on a blog, and because I made a stupid mistake, I lost it. My sixteen year old daughter reminded that I should have typed it in Word, then copied and pasted it into TypePad. I guess I'll know now!

Anyway, I am not going to try to replicate that blog, brilliant as it was. (You'll just have to take my word for that.) I'm going a different direction.

The first night of our conversation Volf had drawn a distinction between his primary interests theologically and those of Stanley Hauerwas. Some might have taken it to be a put down of Stanley's work, but it didn't appear that way to me, nor did Volf seem to intend that. He did, however, point out what he thought were some of the limitations of the Hauerwasean (is that even a word?)approach. This is, after all, what theologians do for each other, point out the strengths and limitations of each other's approaches. In response to a question today, though, Miroslav called Hauerwas a "theological Picasso" (a compliment) and said that he stimulates the theological imagination, even when it takes a different direction from the one he might have intended.

Isn't that what all good teachers do? Anyway, it reminded me of my favorite Jewish teaching story, so I decided to share that with you.

 

Once there was a rabbi who had taught hundreds of students during his lifetime. In his great old age he decided to invite them all back to see them one more time before he passed from this life to the next.

Surprisingly enough, every single student returned to the town where the rabbi lived. He taught them the wisdom of his many years. No long after the students arrived, though, it became clear that the rabbi would not live much longer.

On the day that the rabbi was to pass from this world to the next he called all of his students to him. They formed a line that began at his bedside and ran out of his room through his house, onto his porch, and into the street. The brightest student the rabbi had ever taught stood by his bedside. The next brightest stood next to him, then the third brightest, in order of their brightness all the way to the end of the line, where the intelligence was cut pretty thin. At the end of the line stood the least intelligent student the rabbi ha ever taught.

When he perceived that the rabbi was about to make his final journey to God, the brightest student leaned over his teacher's bed to ask him one last question. All the students knew that a rabbi's dying words were filled with great spiritual power. As the rabbi labored for breath, his brightest student asked him. “Rebbe, tell me, if you have the strength, what is the meaning of life?”

The rabbi replied in a whisper as he struggled for breath, “My child, life....is....like....a....river.”

The rabbi had spoken so quietly that the student standing next to the brightest couldn't hear, so he asked, “What did the Rebbe say?”

The brightest student turned to the second brightest and repeated the words of their teacher, “The Rebbe said that life is like a river.”
The third brightest student asked the second, “What did the Rebbe say?” and the rabbi's response down the line to the very end. By the time it reached the end of the line, the rabbi's words were repeated like they were holy writ.

When the student standing at the end of the line asked what the rabbi had said the one standing in front of him spoke the word as if they were a prayer, 'The Rebbe said that life is like a river.”

Well this response didn't make any sense to the least bright student, so he asked, “How is life like a river?” The student standing in front of him had no idea how to respond, since he had little more intellectual wherewithal than the last student in line. So he asked the student standing in front of him and the question passed back along the line.

When the question arrived back at the front of the line the brightest student leaned over the rabbi again and asked this final question. “Rebbe, if you have the strength, tell us, how is life like a river?”

And with his dying breath the rabbi replied, “So maybe it's not like a river!”

Shalom,

Michael

Great Questions from Brian McLaren

Apparently some from the right end of the theological spectrum have been ragging on the Emergent folk about departing from  what they consider to be the only true Christian understanding of the atonement. (In truth there have been several throughout the history of the Church.) Today in the question and answer portion of the theological conversation Brian McLaren raised some really penetrating questions about the Penal Substitutionary Theory of Atonement. For a good blog on this very topic check out Jonathon Norman's thoughts on the subject. The basic idea of this theory is that God's holiness had been so offended by our sin that only a blood sacrifice would satisfy God righteous anger. So God killed Jesus as that blood sacrifice.

Brian's questions were:

Who was punishing Jesus on the cross? The Romans? The religious authorities? Or God?

If God was the one punishing Jesus because God was so angry about our sinfulness, doesn't that make the Christian community like a disfuntional family who pretends the dad of the family is nice while all the time that same dad beats the children in private?

Too often this idea means that we identify Jesus as one fo the powerful of the world whose right it is to make people suffer--a destructive idea that dishonors God and Jesus, if there ever was one.

Mirolsav responded by describing Jesus as "the Judge who is judged in our place." In Jesus God takes the sin of the world into God's self. After Jesus there is no place for retribution any more.

A Couple of Photos

Miroslav Volf--Day 2

Miroslav rattled some cages today when he declared that he thought atheists may be closer to God than many Christians. We Christians are not very good at embracing God, he said, much less putting that embrace into practice in our daily lives. The indifference to God exhibited my many Christians is more troubling to Volf than the anger of atheists. After all, you have to take God seriously to get angry with God!

Tony asked us to imagine a church full of atheists, but I think it might be more helpful for us to imagine a church full of believers who were intellectually honest and serious about their faith and who welcomed into their congregation atheists who were intellectually honest and serious about their doubts. Now that would be one wild congregation to be a part of!

I have often thought that many of us come to church as much or more to escape God than to encounter God. We are too afraid of where God might lead us or who God might want us to associate with. Instead, as Volf put it, we create God in our own image, then have a semi-sentimental relationship with that image. I believe that the biblical name for that is idolatry!

Now for a few of my favorite Miroslav Volf quotes from today:

"I am betting on the revelation of God"

"I think I have pregnancy envy."

"Theologians (Christians) function as a witnesses rather than as experts We point to something (someone) larger than ourselves."

And my favorite of all!

"The responsibility of the preacher is to point to the power of the Story."

Thanks Gavin

First, thanks to Gavin for inviting me to blog in his absence this week. I hope he has a really "quiet" time with the Trappists in Kentucky.

Second, Let's get the Emergent celebrity sightings out of the way. I didn't have to walk the hallowed halls of Yale Divinity School for very long before I saw Brian McLaren, Tim Keel, Doug Pagitt and lots of other Emo celebs, including our own Nashville UM, Jay Vorhees (who has already beaten me to the punch with a great blog on this opening night of conversation with Miroslav Volf at his blog, Only Wonder Understands.) In addition, I was sitting with some friends from Abingdon at dinner, and who should come sit at our table but Tony Jones and Miroslav Volf. At that point I knew it was going to be a great evening!

Observing the conversation between Tony Jones and Miroslav Volf was like sitting in a room watching two good friends talking about issues that were really important to them. In fact that was what was happening. One of the most engaging parts of the evening was hearing Tony tell about going to Fuller Seminary , and meeting Miroslav, then backpacking across Europe and stayting with his professor in Germany and, finally Volf's native Croatia.

Then Volf told about growing up as the son of a Pentecostal pastor in the former Yugoslavia--a state that was officially atheistic. Any Christians were either Catholic or Orthodox, certainly not Pentecostal. He spoke being mocked by his classmates and the shame of always having to explain his faith. That didn't turn out to be bad training for a future theologian, however.

Later Volf was forced to serve a year of military service in Croatia, though he was a pacifist. Because of these views, his education in the West and his wife who was a U.S. citizen. He was kept under close surveillance all the time. His conversations were recorded. This led to interrogations. (Does this sound familiar to anybody but me?) You see there are places in this world where theology is still a subversive activity!

I'll leave you with a few quotes from Miroslav about the way he "does " theology. Theology, Volf says, is "how faith gets traction." It is "Christian faith seen through the lens of certain practices," which is why he writes theology "for a way of life."

Shalom,

Michael

away for the week

i am away monday thru friday on retreat at Abbey at Gethsemani. i don't anticipate the opportunity to blog, which, should be a welcome break. however i'll return with some thoughts and pictures when i return.

michael williams, my pastor, will be guest blogging from the theological conversation in yale with miroslav volf. it should be really interesting stuff, so keep checking in. i look forward to his incites when i return.

my first youth blogger

so my boy j2 has started blogging. he's one of my youth, so i'm excited he graduated from myspace to blogger credentials. help a ym out, give him a shout & some encouragement, i'd love to see more of hfumc youth blogging. j2 don't forget your roots, we got that myspace ministry going.

"too much on my mind"

sunday photoblog : baptism

super bowl prediction

this year i'm making a super bowl prediction. my prediction says that Psalm 37:4 will come out on top.

call this a biased or sentimental pick, but i've been watching shaun alexander for years since his days at bama & into the nfl. one of the things that i have found admirable about shaun is his outspoken faith. i caught him at a number of campus speaking forums as well as a franklin graham crusade. i'm sure he is not perfect, but he's special and inspirational to many, me included.

"God wants to shine in yoru life. Let Him in. You'll find real love, real peace and real joy. He made this earth for His children. Don't just be apart of it. Be the heir. Own it. God wants us to have it. He'll give you more than anything the world will. Take it" -an inscription Shaun gave a 12-year old boy who wrote and requested an autograph.

he wears the number 37, which is odd for a running back, which was part the reasoning for picking that number. however, in searching the scriptures he found & now signs his signature with Psalm 37:4

"Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart."

so i'm not sure what the score will be, but my prediction is shamelessly relational that seattle wins. i won't claim that God is pro-steelers or pro-seahawks, that's silly. but shaun runs for 135 yards with 2 short yardage touchdowns.

podcast subscriptions

for some reason i'm just getting around to setting up my itunes to download podcast feeds. are there any podcasts out there that you would suggest subscribing too. currently i've got the methocast & the british methodist church. they don't have to be faith based, but it shouldn't be lame (ie. bad recording, shallow content, etc).

to announce, as everyone else, jonathon & i have talked about a youth ministry podcast as well michael (my pastor) and i have talked about doing a narrative podcast too.. be on the look out.

kicking stphransus out of school

so one day i'm having lunch with jonathon with other youth workers. he pays his tab and heads off to the hs across the street to have lunch with some of his youth. about an hour later jonathon returns. not with some story of rectangular pizza with two pepperoni or 'steak' that is some cross between country fried steak & meatloaf. no, he comes back talking about how he was kicked out of said school. apparently jonathon forgot about this particular incident.

i'm reminded of this incident as john and shane are talking about speaking in tongues. what it means, how does it look, etc.

as a youth minister, and a methodist one at that, we don't talk about speaking in tongues. so i've probably come up with my theology on tongues with little instruction, it's much more from my own meditations & contexts.

i look over this as one of the gifts of the spirit. it's in there, so what is the gift mean for us now?

i've come to see this as speaking in tongues is much more about understanding. when the spirit descended upon the apostles in Acts, it helped them to hear and understand each other. so most people would assume that has to do with language. i'm no so sure that was or is always the case. could it not be the case that if i were gifted with speaking in tongues i am given a gift of listening to and understanding a teenager. i can hear and speak to their real hurts/needs/expressions/questions. i'd say in a world today, where all we do is talk talk talk & yell sometimes, if we are truly gifted we would have people who help us to listen and understand so that we know what God is doing in our lives.

now, as jonathon found out. the principal decided to hold off all visitations after this said incident. it's a piece where church doctrine/practice goes wrong because they don't take time to understand what messages the youth hear (in trying to understand church speak whatever denom). my favorite quote though is this.

Second Mother: “They brainwashed them.”
The second mother said the church turned her daughter into “a religious freak.”

i find this funny, not because of the tongues. but if we youth ministers convicted our youth to walk as Christ really walked then we'd have many parents who would be saying they are religious freaks.

:: news story not written by agape press ::

congrats youngmans

big congrats to jenny and mark youngman on the birth of child 2.

Myles Philip Youngman!

Born: 2/1/06
Time: Around 3:42 in the afternoon
Weight: 8 lb. 1/4 oz
Length: 20 inches

He's beautiful. He has dark brown hair (Jenny's wondering where he got it!) with some little fuzzy sideburns. His complexion is perfect, only a few tiny scars from delivery. He slept the entire time some of the girls from the office visited, but he was quite content to be passed around and rocked by all.

Jenny believes they may go home on Friday morning, and her mom arrived today to help out for a few weeks.

Mom, Dad, Gracie, and Myles are doing fine!!

i saw mark last week and he said he was inspired to really blog again. wondering if new child will help that through inspiration and/or sleepness nights. we shall see.

how does this look

jay is busy mobile blogging, so i'm throwing up this doc that we feel is a pretty good proposal for this future internet conference of bloggers and churches looking to get into using the web progressively. check it out, it's our first draft, so be gentle.. ps: don't be surprised to see some of your names on here & some not.

:: download pdf ::

blog emails

i find it interesting the folks that stumble onto this corner of the internet. even more interesting are the ones that email me for some sort of request. thought i'd share a couple

I just happened upon your blog after googling "spiritual play" and found what you wrote very interesting! I am writing a dissertation about Paganism and play and I would also like to include examples of play with the Christian tradition. If you have time, may I ask you a few questions about your thoughts on this?

and

Long story short...I live in Green Hills area; I'm married w/ grown children and want a church home nearby...I realize your church is in Hendersonville but thought perhaps you may know of a St Benedict connection near me?? I am longing to worship in that way again; liturgically and with lectio divino as a basis...and of course, community.